Thursday, June 30, 2011

The Invitation

Was reading through some old posts in a far off distant blog elsewhere...and I found this one to be worth re-publishing

The Invitation

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. 

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive. 

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon, I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow. If you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear or further pain! I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance wtith wildness and let the ecstacy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human. 

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true, I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy. I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence. 

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!" 

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be dont to feed the children. 

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back. 

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away. 

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments. 

-Oriah Mountain Dreamer 

Reason, Season, or a Lifetime

Today was one of mixed emotions....
Sadness, Happiness, Fear, Uncertainty, Love

Sadness because of lost friendships and connections that may tentatively been cut; Happiness that somehow Time or The Universe or God really knows what its doing - timing seems "perfect"; Fear that I'll end up in the same black oblivion of "unemployment" - a shame and embarrassment whose heavy weight never seemed to let up; Uncertainty of the future and its nervous opportunities; Love for people, of a place, and for many things.

A chapter of my life was quickly written and then the book was slammed shut. It seemed as though my life blazed right on through and now I fear the standstill that somehow manages to manifest itself. The old adage of "The Calm before the Storm" percolates in my mind.

I find myself reflecting upon an email that seems to coincide nicely with words from today: "People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime."

I am morose over the loss I have suffered today, but I think about the unique opportunity that this loss has provided me with. Without this loss, I would not be available to seek out a new and exciting enterprise: one that I have long put on hold. Without this loss, I would not be able to be caregiver to family, mother to a son, research assistant to a system, or a avid-hiker/health nut for my planned, but not yet created child.

The opportunities that lie in waiting are vast: a letter that conveniently shows up after being "lost," a letter that will allow for a transition for a big change, my new enterprise and the time necessary to see it manifest, time to prepare myself, mentally and physically, for the extremes that my body will go through for creating life, and space to reflect and appreciate the relationships I have made.

Whether you are in my life for a "REASON" a "SEASON" or a "LIFETIME" - I am thankful that you allowed me into your life. I am thankful that you heard and listened to me. I am thankful for the lessons you've taught me. I hope that I too, can function in your life as a "REASON" for a "SEASON" or last for a "LIFETIME"